Programme · Relationship conflict · Fair Fight
Fair Fight
Handling conflict without blowups, with DBT
Conflict escalates in the body before it escalates in the room. This program teaches the skills for your half of a fight: reading your own escalation curve before it peaks, calling a real timeout instead of a wall, coming back to the actual issue instead of the case that built itself in your head, and repairing fast when it goes wrong anyway.
Escalation has a shape, too
- Disagreements that end up bigger than whatever started them.
- Voices raised, or silence used as a weapon.
- Old grievances dragged back in to win the current one.
- Walking out and calling it a timeout.
- The case that builds itself in your head between rounds.
Your log moves the timeout line
Not a course you watch — a loop you run. Fair Fight reads how high your conflicts actually climb and adjusts the point at which you're coached to call a timeout, rather than fixing it at a number picked in week three.
Measure
Ninety seconds after any disagreement: what triggered it, how high it climbed, which tactics you used, whether you called a timeout, whether you repaired.
as it happens · 90 secLearn
Short sessions with Simone teach the method — flooding, the real timeout, staying on the issue, and repair.
10–15 min · most daysAdjust
The weekly review moves your timeout threshold up or down from your own logged escalation data.
weekly review↻ the loop runs weekly — six times
The threshold is the escalation level at which you're coached to call your timeout. It starts around the middle of the scale and then moves — down if your fights are cresting before you call it, up as you get better at catching them early. There's a floor, because a timeout called too late isn't a timeout. No daily check-in: conflicts are events, not days.
Six weeks, one method
Fifteen sessions and five weekly reviews. The first week is free — including your baseline tactic map.
Week 1How Fights EscalateThe body, then your own tactics3 Sitzungen
Week 2The Real TimeoutCall it, cool down, come back4 Sitzungen
Week 3Staying on the IssueOne issue, a warm room, a fair complaint4 Sitzungen
Week 4When It Goes Wrong AnywayFast repair, the layer underneath, a heavier repair4 Sitzungen
Week 5Fighting Less, Fighting BetterThe floor, the small moments, your contract4 Sitzungen
Week 6Keep It FairYour data, and graduation1 Sitzungen
Simone
DBT: interpersonal effectiveness · begleitet 4 Programme
The interpersonal-effectiveness coach — warm and refreshingly practical about relationships, scripts and all. Simone treats asking for what you need as a skill, not a personality trait.
“Hi, I'm Simone. Over the next six weeks we're not going to stop the fights — we're going to train your half of them, and let the log show you it moved.”
Conflict skills, built on the escalation model
Fair Fight teaches DBT-informed conflict skills against the flooding and escalation model: timeout and return procedures, GIVE and DEAR MAN applied under pressure, the TIPP-family body brakes for cooling down, and both fast repair and the heavier repair an old wound needs.
- The flooding and escalation model
- Timeout and return procedures
- GIVE and DEAR MAN under fire
- Fast repair and heavier repair
Your half only — and it says so
This program teaches one person's half of a relationship. It cannot make another person call a timeout, hear a complaint fairly, or repair, and the onboarding screen names that plainly as the mutual-escalation note rather than leaving you to discover it. Anyone afraid of a specific person's reactions during conflict is routed to support resources first, and that person's contexts are excluded from the conflict log entirely.
For conflict with a child rather than another adult, Steady Hands is the dedicated program — these skills still apply, but the repair-with-a-child layer lives there. This is not medical advice, and not couples or family therapy.
Fair Fight, im Vergleich zum Wettbewerb
| Fair FightResiliens | Gottman Relationship Advisergottman.com | The Conflict Cure (Love At First Fight)loveatfirstfight.com | Connectedapps.apple.com | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Preis | 149 $ einmalig (Entwurf) — das Programm gehört dir | $189 (reduced from $250), lifetime access | $697 one-time, or three payments of $237 | Free tier; Premium $12.99/month or $77.99/year |
| Struktur | 6 Wochen · 15 Sitzungen + wöchentliche Auswertungen | A 100+ item assessment producing a personalised plan, with video lessons and two re-assessments | Seven weeks, seven video modules and seven downloadable workbooks — connection, communication, safety, needs, rapid repair, the conflict cure, partnership | A conflict tracker rather than a curriculum: a sub-30-second log capturing topic, intensity, who initiated, and resolution status, with Four Horsemen escalation flagging and time-to-repair metrics |
| Personalisierung | Conflict log → escalation data → timeout threshold | Yes — the plan is generated from your assessment results, though it isn't updated by anything you log day to day | None | AI coaching that it says gets more accurate as entries accumulate |
| Menschliche Unterstützung | Selbstgesteuert · integrierte Verweismechanismen zu Kliniker:innen | None in this product | Optional live group coaching calls with the current cohort | None |
| Zugang | Selbstbedienung, heute starten | Direct-to-consumer, explicitly usable alone or with a partner | Direct-to-consumer, web, lifetime | Direct-to-consumer; the tracker explicitly works solo |
| Umfang | 24+ Programme im Katalog · 2-3 verwandte Programme bündeln und sparen | Whole-relationship assessment across five domains; conflict is one of them, not the subject | Single-user-capable — its headline promises results 'even if you're the only one trying' — but aimed at repairing the relationship rather than training your half as a skill | Conflict specifically — the closest mechanic to ours anywhere, without the skills training behind it |
| Plattformen | Web · iOS · Android | Web | Web | iOS |
Quellen: Preise und Programmseiten der Konkurrenz — jeder produktive Wert trägt eine Quell-URL und ein Zugriffsdatum, und unveröffentlichte Fakten sind als „nicht veröffentlicht" gekennzeichnet, niemals geraten.
Warum wir es anders aufgebaut haben
- The line moves because your fights moved. The escalation level at which you're coached to call a timeout isn't a number picked in week three — the weekly review raises or lowers it from your own logged data, with a floor, because a timeout called too late isn't a timeout.
- Skills and data in the same product. The trackers that read your arguments teach nothing. The courses that teach conflict skills log nothing and cost between $250 and $697. This runs both halves against each other.
- Built for one person, and honest about the limit. No partner account and no joint exercises — and it states plainly that it can't make the other person call a timeout, hear a complaint fairly, or repair. The category's flagship workshop won't even let you attend alone.
Kostenlos starten. Weitermachen, wenn es wirkt.
Erste Woche
- Onboarding + two full sessions
- Conflict log
- Your baseline tactic map
Vollständiges Programm
- All six weeks of Fair Fight, yours to keep
- Every session, review, and exercise
- Web + Untangle app access
Arbeitest du an mehr als einem Thema? Verwandte Programme werden gebündelt — zwei oder drei zum Rabatt. Bundles werden zum Start bekannt gegeben.
Bevor du startest
Does my partner need to do this too?
No — and that's the design. This trains your half of a fight, with no partner account and no joint exercises. It also won't claim to change how they fight; it says plainly that it can't.
Isn't a timeout just storming off?
That's exactly the distinction week two draws. A real timeout is called, has a cool-down, and comes back to the issue. Walking out and not returning is stonewalling, and the program treats them as different things.
What if conflict with this person isn't safe?
The onboarding screen asks directly. If you're afraid of someone's reactions, you're routed to support resources first and that person's situations stay out of the conflict log altogether.
How much time does it take?
Ninety seconds after a disagreement, and ten to fifteen minutes most days for the session. There's no daily check-in — conflicts are events, not days.
Be first to fight fair
Fair Fight is launching soon on the web and in the Untangle app. Join the early-access list and we'll let you know the moment it opens.
Eine E-Mail, sobald dein Programm startet. Keine Drip-Kampagne.